i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
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