I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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