I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
You were trust falling into bushes
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
