i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
I wear drunk well.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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