and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
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