oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Randomize
