u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
I look better un-naked...
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize