Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(314): View more from Missouri

Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.

Fav 34 1551 2427
share tweet
(225): View more from Louisiana

Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee

Fav 29 6260 1602
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(940): View more from Texas

I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.

Fav 41 4525 1925
share tweet
(317): View more from Indiana

Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls

Fav 60 1759 7077
share tweet
17 of the Dumbest Defenses Heard in Court
Read it at the TFLN blog
(770): View more from Georgia

If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?

Fav 7 4500 1941
share tweet
(731): View more from Tennessee

What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?

Fav 32 1839 5181
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(484): View more from Pennsylvania

No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.

Fav 6 2838 923
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(705): View more from Ontario

its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like

Fav 1 535 315
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(501): View more from Arkansas

nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative

Fav 0 57 3
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT