FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
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