I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
Randomize
