can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
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