Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
