i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
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