I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
