I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
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