Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
