I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Randomize
