Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Randomize
