windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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