I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize
