dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
Randomize
