Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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