is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
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