i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
I think people are normalizing furries
Randomize
