And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
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You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
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