My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
You may now shotgun with the bride
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Randomize
