Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
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