The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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