youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
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