I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
