oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize
