I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
