You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
