Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
