one might say we're banned from that church
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Randomize
