so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize