shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
its liver damage thursday
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
