Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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