I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Randomize
