when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize