Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
