So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
I just sucked dick on a ferry
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Randomize
