Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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