i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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