didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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