Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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