I think I just saw someone hide a body.
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
