There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Are we still banned from the library?
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
We had sex on a dog bed..
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize