Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
