quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
